do you co-hab?
Why is it that one of the most frequently asked questions of today's couple relationship is: do you two live together?
Once you mention you are in a relationship, someone is bound to ask the question, even when the person knows nothing more about your relationship with your partner, information such as the length of relationship, the type of relationship, etc. It stems a lot from television programs and movies, where Hollywood portrays dating couples as live-ins or contemplating living in (second most common portrayal next to bed-hopping, in my opinion). Sure, it's a big step in a relationship, and the idea of co-hab has been diced and re-diced many times by relationship gurus or your friends. Are we putting too much emphasis on it? Or is co-hab a telling sign of something else to come in the future?
Of course, the one thing we tend to associate with co-hab is--SEX. Especially in the parents' frame of mind, living together means having sex, all the time, as if all the waking moment is devoted to sex. Sarcastically speaking, asking some couple if they live together could be a way of hoping that they are having sex (which we are all very concerned if someone is not).
All is hyped.
There are pros and cons to co-hab, as many of you have already read and heard about, from magazines, online dating tips, your closest friends, or even your own experience. The advantage that most people cite is--testing the water (ie co-hab before marriage to find out if the partner is right for you). The disadvantage is, of course, you are having too much sex. Whatever co-hab means to individual couples, they are always under scrutiny from those around them, and even strangers or mere acquaintances.
Yes, co-hab means commitment. It's tough. It's draining. And the relationship might not improve--it might end. It's like other serious, committed relationship, such as your career, that takes patience and active input to keep it alive. But because so much stigma are placed on co-hab, that it's almost a required step in a relationship before marriage.
Can we ever let the topic go?
Why is it that one of the most frequently asked questions of today's couple relationship is: do you two live together?
Once you mention you are in a relationship, someone is bound to ask the question, even when the person knows nothing more about your relationship with your partner, information such as the length of relationship, the type of relationship, etc. It stems a lot from television programs and movies, where Hollywood portrays dating couples as live-ins or contemplating living in (second most common portrayal next to bed-hopping, in my opinion). Sure, it's a big step in a relationship, and the idea of co-hab has been diced and re-diced many times by relationship gurus or your friends. Are we putting too much emphasis on it? Or is co-hab a telling sign of something else to come in the future?
Of course, the one thing we tend to associate with co-hab is--SEX. Especially in the parents' frame of mind, living together means having sex, all the time, as if all the waking moment is devoted to sex. Sarcastically speaking, asking some couple if they live together could be a way of hoping that they are having sex (which we are all very concerned if someone is not).
All is hyped.
There are pros and cons to co-hab, as many of you have already read and heard about, from magazines, online dating tips, your closest friends, or even your own experience. The advantage that most people cite is--testing the water (ie co-hab before marriage to find out if the partner is right for you). The disadvantage is, of course, you are having too much sex. Whatever co-hab means to individual couples, they are always under scrutiny from those around them, and even strangers or mere acquaintances.
Yes, co-hab means commitment. It's tough. It's draining. And the relationship might not improve--it might end. It's like other serious, committed relationship, such as your career, that takes patience and active input to keep it alive. But because so much stigma are placed on co-hab, that it's almost a required step in a relationship before marriage.
Can we ever let the topic go?
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